


What else can I do?

by Blank_Is_typing



Series: 30 Days of distractions. [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Abuse, Blood, Eating Disorders, Graphic descriptions of suicide, Heavy Angst, Hospitalization, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Kidnapping, M/M, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-01
Updated: 2019-06-01
Packaged: 2020-03-29 10:47:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19018345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blank_Is_typing/pseuds/Blank_Is_typing
Summary: 1/30  in a writing challenge I'm doing.Prompt: He pulled against the ropes with all his might, but they wouldn't give.Don't bother," a voice said. He looked over to discover a thin (guy) bound with the same rope. Although it was dark he could see (his) bused eyes and bloody wrists."I already tried."





	What else can I do?

Woojin woke up, gasping for air. His head felt like it was being crushed by pressure. Using what little strength he had, his eyes opended and he looked around to see himself locked in, what looked like a basement, with a single light in the corner. When he tried to move he realized that his hands were tied above his head. With what little strength he pulled and twisted at the ropes.

"Don't bother," A voice to his left said. He looked over to see a thin man, that couldn't be any older than him, tied up, although he could barely see he could see his wrists were bloody and his eyes were bruised. "I already tried."

"What else can I do?" Woojin said, struggling against the ropes more, beginning to feel the material burn through his wrists. He only stopped when he heard footsteps above him and muffled voices.

"Stop." he said, sounding defeated, "the sooner you give up the better."

"What's your name?" Woojin asked his new roommate.

"Chris," he said.

"Well, Chris, I'm too stubborn for that." He said twisting slightly.

Chris just chuckled slightly,"I thought that too."

"How long have you been here?" Woojin asked, stopping as he heard the footsteps above him stop.

"What month is it?" He asked sounding suddenly tired.

"around October"  

"5 months." He said quietly. 

Woojin was about to say something when the door burst open. He flinched, while Chris just hung his head. 

An extremely muscular guy with a scar down the side of his cheek walked over to Chris. He untied the ropes and Woojin expected Chris to make a run for it or just stand there, but what he actually did made his heart break, but also beat faster in fear.

Chris collapsed onto his knees, wincing as his very severe bruises made contact with the ground. He practically curled into a shaking ball on the ground. The man had no sympathy though and just kicked him. "Get up."

Chris tried to stand, his whole body shaking as he tried to support himself, apparently he wasn't quick enough because he got slammed against the wall. "Get up faster next time," their captor said.

He tied a cloth around Chris's wrist and put a blindfold on him. "Move," He said holding his restraints. 

Chris reluctantly went upstairs, almost looking like a corpse as he did. There was no hope or Joy to be found on him.

Woojin started panicking, what was happening to Chris? After about 30 minutes he heard multiple footsteps and yelling. An hour later he heard broken glass and a scream that sounded almost too much like Chris's.

He heard the footsteps get closer before he saw the door open. The blindfold had been taken off of Chris and he collapsed onto the ground in front of Woojin. 

Woojin looked on in horror as he saw cuts littering Chris's body and a small amount of blood leaking from all of them. He almost screamed when the man approached him with the same Cloth's that he had just been on Chris.

Unlike Chis, when Woojin was released from the ropes he tried to fight his way out and make a run for it but he was just met with a fist to the Jaw and his hands immediately being restrained. He felt a chill up his spine as he walked upstairs, surprised he didn't trip.

The man guiding him suddenly pushed Woojin forward,causing him to land on his knees. Woojin heard murmuring all around him as he stood. "How'd you manage to get this one, looks better than how the other one did when he first showed." A woman's voice said, as hands ran through Woojin's hair.

He felt another hand go down his arm,"I like this one," Another voice said,"he's not nearly as scrawny."

"He does put op one hell of a fight." The one familiar voice in a sea of intimidating unknown ones said. 

Suddenly Woojin remembers how he got here. he had been walking home, granted, it was late and he was taking more shortcuts than he should've. Someone had grabbed him and Woojin had managed to break out of their hold, and fight the masked figure for a while while searching for an escape. That was until he felt a cloth around his mouth and felt everything go dark.

His flashback was broken when he felt a hand go somewhere he really didn't like, causing him tho move backwards and struggle against his restraints. "We can have some fun with him." Woojin could hear the smirk in the woman's voice as she said that. 

"No!" He shouted, hitting himself mentally for letting some fear sneak through.

Suddenly there was a hand across his face followed by a stinging feeling and definitely a red mark,"I don't think you have a say in that," they said anger taking over their voice.

Woojin spent lord knows how long getting passed around like a ball. when he finally was put back into the basement and the blind fold was taken off, he looked up to see Chris looking sadly at him. "Still think you can leave?" He said quietly. he had moved into a corner while Woojin was gone and his eyes were red a puffy. 

Woojin let out a breath of relief when he saw that the cuts had stopped bleeding," I'm so sorry," He whispered, starting to break down.

Chris pulled him into a hug,"at least you're not alone," he said rubbing his back.

* * *

 

After a few weeks he had to deal with the torture of hearing Chris get beaten almost every night and seeing him fall to the floor, uncertain if he was conscious. 

He thought it was going to be like all the other times, he had learned to anticipate what was to come and numb himself to how disgusting he felt. 

But he wasn't ready for this. 

The man who had barely kept them alive stumbled into the basement, the most drunk either of them had seen him. "You." he stalked over to Chris. 

Chris, someone who Woojin had seen endure seemingly endless pain was trembling and begging for mercy,"please, please please. don't do it," tears were streaming down his face. 

A loud smack echoed throughout the room,"Shut up." he spat,"they're sick of you, so I get to have my fun," he smirked.

"No, You can't!" Woojin shouted, pulling against the restrains.

The man just ignored Woojin and pulled out a small yet sharp knife, running it along Chris's collarbone. "This is going to be fun, won't it Chan?"

Chis trembled, trying to get as far away from the blade as possible. "Stop!" Woojin shouted, starting to cry, he was so overwhelmed with fear that he ignored the warm blood falling from his wrists as he tried to break free. 

"Shut up!" He yelled at Woojin, pulling Chris's hair to make him look at his friend. "Just watch and learn your place."

Woojin wanted to scream more but the man had begun making faint cuts in Chris's arms, slowly getting deeper the more he made. The smell of blood began to fill the room as he bled. Once he was satisfied the man moved to his legs, ever so careful to avoid the arteries but continuing to cut.

Woojin had to turn away as he watched his friend suffer, his screams and yelps of pain were getting quieter as time went on and Woojin knew it was from blood loss. He had stupidly gotten hopeful when he heard a knock from upstairs. 

The man frustratingly screamed before cutting the ropes that were holding Chris up and Woojin watched him fall limply on the ground, the blood pooling around his body. 

When he heard the captor yell and sirens starting to go off his heart leaped out of his chest. Even Chris, with the little strength he had left, smiled a little when he felt the basement door being broken open. 

The second he was free from the ropes he ran over to Chris, not caring that his hands were covered in blood. He touched his face lightly, "Chris, look at me, you're going to be okay," he whispered quietly, it was more for himself anyways. Chris nodded faintly before they were both escorted by paramedics. Woojin almost couldn't believe it when he saw the light of day again.

While the were in the ambulance Woojin suddenly didn't have the strength to stay awake and unknowingly fell asleep. 

* * *

When he woke up he was met with his brother, who had his head in his hands next to Woojin's hospital bed. "Seungmin?" He croaked out, it burned to talk but he needed to let his brother know he was there. 

The younger shot up with tears streaming down his face,"Oh my god!" he screamed. He immediately ran to hug Woojin, holding onto him as if he was sacred to let go, but Woojin was too,"I was so scared," Seungmin whispered between sobs wracking his body.

"I was too, I didn't think I'd see you again," Woojin whispered, shaking as he held onto his brother. 

The were like that until the doctor walked in and said he could see friends as soon as everything was checked. 

There was even more Crying when Hyunjin, Minho, and Jeongin walked in but he was happy to cry tears of Joy instead of pain for once. Amidst all of that Woojin realized there was one person he was more worried about than anything,"Chris," he whispered faintly. 

He frantically pressed for the nurse much to his friends confusion,"Where's Chris?" he said panicked.

"He's still in ICU, he's....stable," she said quietly.

"What do you mean stable?" He said, worried.

"He lost a lot of blood and hasn't woken up yet," She explained.

"Isn't it illegal for you to say this?" Jeongin asked. 

"You weren't the one that watched him get sliced open. And I know he'll go crazy looking for answers," she said blankly.

Woojin was worried but he still had a small bit of hope left in him.

* * *

 

 The second he was cleared from the prison of disinfectant and plastic, Woojin made a b-line of Chris's room. His cuts were basically healed, but he looked even more dead, flushed by the florescent lights of the hospital, he still hadn't woken up, and it'd been a week. "Are you related to him?" a nurse said as she watched Woojin look in through the window to his room. 

"No, we...got Checked in, together," he said, shivering at remembering Chris's body covered in blood laying on the floor, his chest hardly moving..

"Well," She checked her clipboard,"Kim Woojin, You're allowed in." She opened the door for him and smiled faintly.

Woojin took a deep breath before walking towards the bed. He didn't want to talk much, since it would fall upon deaf ears. "You're okay, he's gone," was all he said. He keeled next to the bed and grabbed his hand. it was cold and paler than they were when they first met, which was still a lot.

Woojin heard a nose he swore sounded like a sob,looking up he saw Chris starting to shake as tears fell down his face. All that came out of his mouth was a strangled scream as he squeezed Woojin's hands. The nurse from before came rushing in as they separated,"Is he okay?" Woojin said, still slightly shaken.

"His nerves are kicking in, he'll be fine once I get some painkillers into him," She said, attaching a vial to one of the tubes connecting to Chris. "You can wait in the lobby until they've kicked in."

When Woojin opened the door about an hour later he saw Chris instinctively flinch. "W..Woojin?" He said shakily.

"I'm here," he said quietly. He grabbed his hand and Chris pulled him closer, his nails were digging into Woojin's skin but he didn't care, Chris was trembling so hard that he was having trouble breathing. 

"Don't leave," Chris mumbled into his shoulder before sobs wrecked his body until he fell asleep, gripping Woojin.

A few hours later Chris started moving again, and Woojin thought he was waking up. only to have him whimper and scream in his sleep.

Woojin knew the signs of a nightmare because he'd been having them too. But Chris's had to have been so much worse.

He still called him Chris, even if everyone around them called him Chan. He could see the flash of fear in his eyes every time someone called him that name. Besides, it was he name he told to Woojin, it's the name he's ging to use. A few days before Chris's release he'd been diagnosed with PTSD. Something that wasn't unexpected.

"No, I can't do that,"Chris shook his head at Woojin's offer of letting him stay at his place.

"Do you have family here?" Woojin asked, he honestly didn't know much about Chris.  

"My brother lives in Busan, and I lost my phone so I haven't called him. My parents probably blocked both of us, so I'm stuck," he sighed, the realization hitting him as he talked. 

"Well you literally can't live alone anymore, and it's just me," Woojin said.

Chris nodded,"I have 2 roommates and I don't think they'd fully understand."

"You should contact them, you've been missing for 6 months," Woojin patted his shoulder.

The next day Woojin walked with Chris as he got checked out of the hospital. However as soon as they got into the parking lot the other froze. 

"Hyung!" a voice yelled, it sounded pretty young. 

Suddenly Chris had been consumed in a hug by, Woojin presumed, one of his roommates. 

The smile that he saw spread across Chris's face as he hugged his crying friend while light tears ran down his face was unforgettable. 

"Yah, you go missing for 6 months and the first person you call is the CEO?" a shorter person stalked over to him. Chris tensed for a second before he saw the tears running down his seemingly angry friend's cheeks.

"I missed you too," he laughed, pulling them both into a hug.

Woojin smiled at the interaction before they pulled apart and Chris introduced him. "This is Woojin," he said wiping his tears,"I met him while I was...yeah."

They both hugged him,"Good to meet you, I'm Jisung," he held out his hand to shake it.

The other one held out his hand to shake it as well,"I'm Changbin."

Woojin shook both their hands,"Is it okay if Chris stays with me for a while. We already talked about it."

They both nodded,"If he already agreed to it, you don't have to come to us."

Woojin nodded the whole situation settled, they all agreed to meet at his place, both to help Chris move in and to talk a little more.

* * *

 

Navigating Chris's PTSD was difficult when Woojin had his own symptoms, but the two had quickly learned they liked the arrangement this way, with 7 check-in's throughout the week and an actual professional helping them every 3 days.

They had learned that neither of them liked being out after sunset, Chris having a full on panic attack and clawing at anything he could find, while Woojin just had a higher level of anxiety and unease. When Chris decided to start working again he got taken there by Jisung and Changbin. Seungmin and Jeongin accompanied Woojin wherever he needed to go as well.

But the nights were definitely the worst. 

The first night had gone fairly well, until Chris woke up and almost punched Woojin because he was in an unfamiliar environment. He quickly shook him awake when he felt himself starting to panic and clung to Woojin's arm as he groggily rocked him back and forth. 

It lead for an extremely emotional reunion the next day when Felix is at the door and immediately grabbed onto his sobbing brother the second it opens. 

"I never should've left," Felix sobbed, the brothers holding onto each other for dear life. "I-I was so scared, you stopped calling and no one had seen you for days, When I gt the call that you'd gone missing I panicked. This was my fault." he said.

Chris shook his head,"It's not your fault, you left to follow your dreams, and I mean you found something. This," he took a shaky breath,"this was just an unfortunate indecent."

Woojin though it was sweet but also dangerous when Chris put other's needs before his own. He was probably hurting long before he got kidnapped. 

But the worst night was after about a month,"Why can't I just die!" Chris screamed as he sobbed harder than he had for a while. "I was so close to being free, but I just can't get anything I want! My life wants to be a living hell, probably just preparing me for it."

Woojin just at there and helped him though it, he could list all the reasons he want's Chris to live but it's pointless when he feels the same way. Maybe they could die together.

"Is life really worth all of this?" Chris cried. 

"Yes." was all Woojin said.

Without thinking Chris leaned over and kissed him, it was different when you both had to watch each other live out your worst nightmare. When they pulled away Woojin had a trail of tears down his face as well,"Do it again," he said before Chris could apologize.

And he did. For that small moment in time it felt like all their pain had been lifted of of their shoulders, and scatted around. But it can't always be like that.

Because soon after Chris got a little better, Woojin got much worse.

* * *

_Woojin looked around frantic._

_He could smell the blood coming from in front of him._

_He felt hands at the back of his head untie the blindfold, only to reveal his apartment, everything looked normal, except the light coming from his bathroom door._

_Panicking, he sprinted across the room and pushed opened the bathroom door. There, limp and slightly contorted on the floor, was Chris's lifeless body, cut up the exact same way it was when they were in that basement._

_But this time there was a knife next to his lifeless hand and 'I'm okay ' written on the mirror above him._

_Woojin grabbed his body and sobbed for what felt like hours as he tried every way he knew how to save him._

_When he finally accepted Chris wasn't coming back he grabbed the knife and cut two long, deep slits down both his arms, smiling as he felt the warmth leave his body._

_He grabbed Chris's hand and chuckled slightly before he lost consciousness._

WooJIn woke up with a start, the only thing he could think to do was grab his hair and scream. His heart started beating faster as a wave of panic forced him to throw off the covers at the sight of Chris being missing. 

When he saw the light in the bathroom on he ran to it and started beating on the locked door.

It swung open to reveal a distressed Chris with his eyes popping out of his head. 

 Woojin didn't think he Just grabbed Chris's arms and started inspecting him for cuts. He only stopped when He felt his hand being held and Chris looking into his frantic eyes.

"I'm okay," he said quietly. 

Woojin couldn't take it. He  fell to the floor crying, his body shaking so much it almost looked like he was having a seizure. Chris just followed him to the floor and interlocked their hands as he pulled him to his chest.

Woojin buried his face there as Chris stroked his back, waiting for everything to pass. 

At some point they had both fallen asleep, only waking up when there was a knock at the door. One, or all seven of their personal bodyguards checking in on them. 

WooJin looked at Chris and chuckled dryly,"We're a mess."

"But we're getting better, slowly." Chris pecked Woojin on the top of his head,"What else can we do?"  


End file.
